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Thursday, February 28, 2013

I Don't Know Anything About Peace But Neither Do The Geniuses Either

    Back when our money systems were invented we weren't totally aware of how many resources were available across the planet. That's why things fluctuated so much. That's why we had so much war. We lived in an information vacuum, we didn't have lights, we didn't have electricity. It was scary as hell. People were literally in the dark. Trade was a luxury and when you weren't sure you could get more goods to exchange you killed or got killed to get by.

     Today we have a pretty exact idea of how much gold, silver and copper there is. We know how much coal, iron, oil, sunlight, clean water and clean air there is. We know exactly how much land is available and how much of it is inhabitable and what areas can be used for industry. We know how many people each country possesses and how many of them are hungry and sick.Thanks to the internet, satellites, advanced geothermal and geological mapping technology we have a chance to collect this data, to get a birds eye view of it and engineer a new wealth distribution model to ease humanity's suffering. Why don't we do it?

     The wealthy need the working class culturally bound to the ideas of walls and borders so that their families can hide behind them and hoard the wealth for themselves. We let our leaders convince us that war is the only way to protect the little we have and to get what we need to stay alive. Masses struggle in a working rut, praying for some mercy, divided by religious influences and accept the idea that some people are blessed and some people must suffer to maintain the spiritual balance of the world and appease the gods. We constantly celebrate the victory of one man, one nation, at the expense of many. This is why nothing changes.

     We are addicted to the idea that we can't make life more fair because if life was meant to be fair God would have just made it fair by nature. We point at gazelles being eaten by lions and say, 'see that's why humans can't stop killing each other' like we are walking around naked and craving cold meat wrapped in fur.

     We compare ourselves to animals that don't have our biological opportunities to ease our guilty conscience. For whatever reason it took us a long time to figure out how to get out of the grass and invent ipads, toilets and fast food but we did it. We now have to tools we need to know better. War is not a necessary evil for distributing wealth, it is a tool for stealing wealth. War it is proof of our continued barbarism, collective cowardice and constant capitulation to violence. We suck when we resort to war. Every time a war is announce it should be prefaced with the following statement:

     The human race is determined to prove once again that it is pathetic and that it's leaders, in spite of all their education, are the stupidest fuckheads alive.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Diary of a Mad Woman - Ben Affleck Vs. Al Gore

A while ago I read a book called Radical Honesty. Good book but it should have a disclaimer under the subtitle. Being radically honest has not helped me one bit. Or maybe it has helped me at times, but because it's hurt me more times than it's helped me I can't even see any benefits anymore. The warning label on the book should say: Only read this book and apply it's theories if you know that whatever you say will sound like what people want to hear in the way that they want to hear it.

In order for me to be radically honest I need to burn every bridge between me and civilization just to stay alive inside. How the fuck is everyone just going along with all the madness that is taking place on this planet without using the f-word in every other sentence like I am?

We live in a world where people like Ben Affleck talk about having been down and out in showbiz while accepting an Oscar in the prime of his young life. What the fuck is he talking about? The only time his career seemed to kind of slow down was those few months when he was on the cover of every magazine, getting paid millions of dollars to make movies while having sex with Jennifer Lopez, one of the most gorgeous women to walk Earth. That was his low point, I guess, slumming it with one of us puerto rican chicks and causing a tabloid orgy. Does Ben Affleck not know about all of the poverty that is leading to children and women being sold into sex slavery everyday? Does he not know how many families cower in fear of domestic abusers? Has he not heard about how women are being ripped to pieces by gangs of men on a daily basis? What the fuck is Ben Affleck fucking talking about? When was his ass ever knocked down? It is this massive distortion and amplification of popular people's petty problems overshadowing the desperate plight of the people of this planet, yet again, that has got me on my latest mood swing down.

We should all be fucking MAD at how we are being driven above the speed limit toward our own extinction by the rich and powerful. Just like the great Paddy Chaefsky scripted for Howard Beale in Network we should "Be MAD AS HELL and NOT WANT TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!" 

So, if Ben Affleck is going to use his one time to talk to millions of people at once through the television to say, "Weep for me, I had a few bad days once, when I had to give up a great piece of ass to maintain my artistic integrity" then I am going to use my highly unpopular blog to tell you to "weep for you." This Ben Affleck can't save us. Why are we giving him shiny gold men and fame and fortune and millions of dollars?  He is something to advertise on so that is how I am using him today. This blog entry isn't even really about Ben Affleck, I just know there are horny men and women that google his name every day because they want to sleep with him and this is my chance to accidently get on their radar to tell them to wake the fuck up and give a shit about something that really matters, like Al Gore.

The other day I was in St. Mark's book shop and I was looking for some brain food and I saw Al Gore's new book, The Future. It had a sticker: Signed Copy! I opened it to look at the signature and when I saw his handwriting I put the book back down totally uninterested. 

Al's signature was a jumble of shapes with long limbs that reached back into the signature strangling it while also framing it. The mess of long lines that refused to extend outward forced his whole name into a contained parallelogram, "Al Gore" was boxed in by the aborted reach of his frantic awkward flourishes and it made it hard to read what he was trying to tell me: his name. And that is what is diminishing Al Gore's power in a nutshell. 

Al Gore has this amazingly brilliant mind, governed by a righteous moral compass and deep-rooted sense of decency, but he is fucking mad as hell and because he feels the need to communicate in a way that is non-offensive and potentially upsetting he is not being heard. All of the anger that he could be creatively demonstrating would motivate people to absorb the urgency of his message but his voice is being strangled by his conditioning to obey polite conventions.

Our former Veep's efforts would be accelerated by a little bit of creative rage now and again. He said something so brilliant in the new Rolling Stone. I'm paraphrasing, but he basically said that if there had been a legal way to launch a violent revolution against the Bush war machine after the 2000 election he may have pursued it, and then he laughed, and it was the first time I felt like he was getting close to really saying the truth. The fight we are in right now, to appease our ecosystem before it eats us alive, is a life or death situation. But he is telling us the world is hurtling to a terrible end for us in a gentlemanly whisper. Gore's book should be retitled, Wake the Fuck Up You Stupid Idiots, I'm Trying To Tell You You Are All Going To Die! and maybe he could finally get people's attention toward solving the very real problems of our time, before it's too late. 

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Beyonce, Lip Synching, Power Outages and The Death of the American Soul

When I first saw Beyonce's performance of the National Anthem at the United States Presidential Inauguration I thought it was a grand tribute in spite of her ridiculous giant green earrings. Then I found out she lip synched and it really fucking pissed me off! Here is why it should piss you off too:

What would happen to America if all of us just faked it at work like Beyonce?

What would happen if farmers just pretended to farm and bus drivers just pretended to drive and surgeons just pretended to do surgery? What if scientists just pretended to do studies and safety inspectors just pretended to look closely and pilots just pretended to fly? What if firemen just pretended to use their hoses and bodyguards pretended to know martial arts and construction workers just pretended to bolt all the parts of a building together? What if trash collectors just pretended to pick up the trash? What if President Obama just pretended to give a damn about this country?

We have a lot of hard work to do in America and it's really hard work, and it's back breaking work for many people. Much of the work that's done everyday by millions of people is crucial, essential, thankless, loveless, monotonous work that they have to do just to feed their families and stay alive. This is the kind of hardship we foist on the people who really do the work that keeps us functioning as a society.

Beyonce gets to sing and dance for the most glittering living possible. She gets paid millions of dollars every year because hardworking people in the paragraph above and below this one made her 'top of the food chain' because they invested in her talent. THAT IS WHY Beyonce has a responsibility to be worthy of the tremendous outpouring of her fan's hopes and dreams by putting her ass on the line, when she accepts a live gig, by opening her mouth and singing for her supper like the rest of us have to! She was invited to display her talent at the ultimate celebration to herald our President, our democratic process, and our collective determination to champion some of the most important life sustaining values ever prescribed into law and she faked it. What kind of soulless, money-sucking creep do you have to be to do that and not see how fucking gross that is? The only thing more lame than Beyonce faking it at the Inauguration was the high profile sycophants who publicly defended her right to do whatever she wants because she is "so hot".

Millions of people in this country are overworked and underpaid while working several jobs. Most people live paycheck to paycheck and are struggling just to get by. They have no chance to 'fake it' and still be employed and beloved by all who know them. 'Regular people' get their faces dragged through the shittiest realities with no hope in sight.  Their bosses show them no mercy and if they make one mistake their whole world comes crashing down around them and they would have nothing to save them or their families from hell on Earth.

Beyonce gets overpaid to be a singer and she doesn't even have the courage to risk hitting the wrong note in a moment of heartfelt, deep, true, sincere, human affection for the nation and people that made her rich?  Well then, Miss Beyonce is not a powerful woman AT ALL, she is such a terrified, fragile, artificial beauty that she cannot allow her image of absolute perfection to be contaminated by any human realness–ever! God forbid her voice should crack when she hits the high notes while singing "Land of the free and the home of the brave."!! What if Beyonce's voice cracked while she was up there? WTF? OMG! She would only have millions of dollars, luxuriously decorated mansions, cars, planes and boats to go home to until–the next gig.  The Super Bowl.

But before we go to the Super Bowl with Beyonce, remember what I have said so far:
For someone to lip synch the National Anthem
at the Inauguration
of The President of the United States,
the leader of the country,
the person who has to stand up
and REALLY do something
in the tumultuous wake of more pressures than I can imagine,
to lip synch
as you wish the President well on the next four years
is a foul and gutless act.
It is a scandalous act.
It is an act of hypocrisy and cowardice that should bring deep shame to the person who dares to masquerade in this way.

But there is no time for shame, for someone as hot as Beyonce!

The Super Bowl is a gig with real money on the line, this is a gig where people are actually tuned in, sitting at attention in front of their TV's ready to be wowed with the things that really matter; over-produced beer commercials, ridiculously sentimental car commercials, women in tiny skirts jumping around like idiots for the tiny screaming dots in the crowd that paid $1,000 a seat for the chance to be there, live in the cold, cheering themselves voiceless for men who try to kill each other during an elaborate game of "catch" while the benched players make their hometowns proud from the sidelines by spitting on the ground and grabbing their teammates' asses and cocks.

Beyonce was in her element at the Super Bowl. Like a good whore honoring the Overlords of the White Male Dominated Capitalist Machine that ensnares us all, Beyonce showed up at the Super Bowl in skimpy leathery & lace lingerie, pimped out her two sisters to make the offerings more worthy of our corporate slavemasters, and she SANG her heart out, for real. (I think.) She sang and she danced, and made fun of the fact that she didn't sing at the inauguration, and she gyrated and she pouted. She spread her legs and bent over backwards with her holy vulva reaching out to the crowd, inviting the people to climb inside to get out of the cold, while a spectacular fireworks show erupted all around her, illuminting giant holograms of 10 Beyonces and massive neon depictions of HER OWN FACE flanking her on both sides with electric hair extensions taking up the rest of the field, waving like a technological miracle. Then Beyonce finished singing. She closed her legs, got up off the ground, said good night, took her hot ass off the field, and went backstage smiling like a victor to piles of fresh flowers and the adoration of the people in her entourage.
Then the lights went out.

Then the lights went out at the Super Bowl.

All the the players and fans were plunged into darkness.

Beyonce's big show for us, in honor of herself, had blown a fuse because the electricians in charge of the lights didn't really know how to keep them on after such an expensive and selfish display of 'Me Me Me'. I bet someone will be fired for letting that happen. It won't be Beyonce, though. It will be someone with a blue collar.

The Super Bowl Blackout is NOT Beyonce's fault. It's our fault.
It's our fault that we literally put all our working class energy into people who take it all into themselves and give us nothing back but more chances to worship them.

The Super Bowl blackout is a metaphor for how bad we are all selling ourselves out, America.
You can ignore it, if you want.
You can keep accepting singers that don't really sing
and politicians who don't really care.

It's your country, do what you want with it.
Or you can just pretend it's your country.
Or you can pretend to do what you want with it.
Whatever, it doesn't matter.
Just pretend to finish reading this.
The world is your oyster, if you are willing to be a big phony.