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Thursday, March 27, 2014

#VOGUEISDEAD


When Kanye West was publicly asked why he loved Kim Kardashian, by Kim Kardashian’s mother on TV he said he did not know why. He actually said that. He said he did not know why he was in love with her daughter, Kim. In most relationships such a sub-standard, passionless, ambivalent, public declaration of unfocused affection would be a red flag to a loving mother, but when the mother is a calculated freak, so dazzled by the fame of the mindless suitor, the red flag goes ignored.

Kanye went on to say to the world that he decided to make Kim his wife when she made enough money to support herself so she wouldn’t be asking him for money. This is the man that makes her heart skip a beat. Now that Kim comes with the proper dowry, this fine man will take on the burden of her devotion. And while he was being the least seductive, least romantic, tool on the planet, Kim was doing interviews saying he was her best friend. A romance written by publicists is puke-worthy, pathetic and as plastic as a credit card.

Kim’s whole ambition in this world is cold and corporate, because she is her creepy mother’s daughter, which is why her beloved fiance’s carefully constructed  profession of love is all about reinforcing Kim’s image as a successful business entity. He may love her, (yeah, right) but he does not know why he loves her. The self-professed genius, does not know. I know, why he loves her though. I suspect he loves her much the way you and I love an ATM machine when we really need cash.

The most human thing Kanye said about Kim was that she offered him a support system and that too was still a statement all about everything she could do for him and nothing to do about what she actually means to him. Kanye is all about Kanye and Kanye loves his big, idiot baby self more than he loves anyone on this planet. But let’s cut him a break. He’s been a hot mess since his momager died, she was the only one who loved him more than he did. Now thanks to Kim he has a new momager, his tenacious momager-in-law, Kris and she will be SOOOO happy to be his new mommy and he loves Kim for bringing his mommy back from the dead. Yes, I am sure he wishes the resurrection of his mommy wasn’t an annoying, pushy, white woman, but beggars can’t be choosers.

We live in the age of Idiocracy, where parents give birth in an automated world and wake up screaming in the night when they realize they don’t know how to raise a human being because they don’t have a show about that on TV. We shouldn’t be surprised when two mindless, money powered flesh-bots end up on the cover of the world’s elite style and culture magazine, it makes total sense.

We live in a time of extraordinary possibility, the technology at our fingertips gives us godlike powers of creativity, there are artists and thinkers doing mind-blowing work, and yet this fucking lazy country is full of entitled pieces of shit who spend their time watching rich people shop, while taking selfies and fucking all day, while the helicopter mommies do everything for them so their dreams just manifest by their bedside as soon as they wake up in the morning and they don’t ever actually have to do anything to earn it, miracles just happen, it is the American Dream. That’s why we have so many reality shows.

Everybody wants to be a star and if they can’t be a star they would like to AT LEAST go to college and get drunk for four years to graduate and get a six figure job. No one wants to start from the ground up. They want to start their career in the corner office.  They would like to be in charge of other people. They are willing to go to meetings 7 hours a day and to eat lunch during the eighth. They are happy to get paid while outsourcing the actual invention and production of products to someone else, somewhere else. They want to put money in a bank and have it multiply like gremlins. If people can plagiarize and pinch ideas to get credit for inventing something that’s even better, and more profitable than having to develop an original idea.

Kim and Kanye represent the new American Dream, the new average American who just wants to go home from a really fun day of having everyone around you do everything for you. Everyone wants to be the star, to be loved and adored for being so worthy of being so well taken care of just for being born. Everyone wants a trophy for being the worst at everything, while the people who actually struggle to do things well keep civilization standing from their place in the shadows. Kim and Kanye on the cover of  Vogue, is that trophy that you give the noisy losers so they stop crying, so every other loser feels like they too have a chance to win something they don’t deserve. Our modern society needs to see losers winning so they won’t realize what a bunch of fucking losers we are all becoming.

Yes. We are losers. We let ivy-league educated and certified idiot politicians lead us to war year after year, we let school budgets be pillaged, we refuse to put wheelchair ramps in every building, we make blind people jump through bureaucratic hoops to get seeing eye dogs, we let starving families live in their cars and we let veterans live on the streets, we put potheads in prison and let pedophiles collect the Cecil B. DeMille award. We are the lamest bunch of shitheads when you consider what we could be accomplishing if we just demanded that the people we celebrate in the media actually deserve our praise. If we had Sandra Fluke on the cover of Vogue we might have a chance at beauty being more than skin deep.

Anna Wintour has no desire to promote thinking, accomplished women. She needs to be the smartest woman in the room to keep her position of power. Anna needs Kim on the cover of Vogue to create the illusion that she can see the good in the mentally challenged. Anna is accepting, she has accepted the Beverly Hills born-to-porn, earnest Cinderella, who has never cleaned her own floors, and she has sent her an invite to the ball, because Anna is more than a rat-faced, social tyrant.  Anna thought she could get her readers to admire a doe-eyed, relentless, untalented moron like Kim, because Anna is condescending as fuck.

Poor Kim needed her dream to come true. Kim is a woman who spent over thirty years primping and priming and buffing herself, while groveling for a chance to be recognized by Anna for being a beauty and fashion icon, but that wasn’t enough. Anna needed to see Kim down on all fours taking it in the mouth, cunt and ass from a celebrity before she would allow Kim’s beauty to be celebrated and Kim thanked her for the extraordinary honor by tweeting that she was so excited to be on the cover of Vogue that she could “hardly breath.” Yes. Kim cannot even spell breathe. But she is our role model, for being so stupid and so beautiful and so fuckable that a celebrity will marry her. And Anna says that is a sign of great character.

When I think of the suicide of L’Wren Scott during this time I see a woman who lived for fashion and the art form that it is. How much the fashion world has lost when someone so talented sees no hope for a future in her industry for her. She bought into the lie that Anna Wintour is promoting with her Kimye cover. L'Wren spent years with a famous man, wanting to be his companion in this world, his intellectual equal, his muse, but she was seen as a “Yoko”, always somehow a less than, because without him she was just one more woman in the crowd, but with him, she became Mick Jagger’s girlfriend, something that could be promoted, and when she believed her relationship with this powerful man was at an end, she saw no hope for herself, and she gave up her life, her friends and her patrons and the world lost so many years of her creations, so many opportunities to create and share the beautiful work a seasoned artisan does, in the autumn of her life. She had so much to claim during the bitterness of her heartache. That’s when a woman really learns to be strong and pure in her reflections and expressions about the journey we are all on. That’s when she really discovers what she has to share. And maybe L’Wren’s suicide is her last artistic statement. Maybe with the space she is leaving in the fashion world she is saying there is no hope, even for the gracious, the gifted, the devoted, the conscientious, the patient, the poetic, the productive, the skilled–the true lovers of fashion, art and humanity.

Alexander McQueen created works of art that make a mannequin come to life in a way that will haunt you forever, what his clothing does with the body of a real woman makes it impossible not to recognize the power of the human spirit and the glorious eternal might of feminine energy. He too lost his desire to create in this new fashion world, where mediocrity reigns and Anna Wintour co-signs that shit.

Fashion is the art of what it means to be human. All other animals crawl across the globe covered in nothing but their own skin. We show our joy in all the bounty of the earth by plucking off beautiful bits of it and draping ourselves in the glories we find and weaving and stitching these materials into expressions of gratitude for creation and to show our pride in our masterful uniqueness, we dig up the twinkling rocks that live in the ground and satellite our limbs, necks, crowns and ears in cosmic tones. We demonstrate our fearless intrepid audacity by ripping the skins from other animals and wearing them to live in places we were not meant to go. Sometimes we wear rags, to show that there is beauty in decay.

Anna Wintour’s decision to put Kimye on the cover is not a celebration of fashion or of Kim’s "great character", or a celebration of a great romance, or a celebration of anything, it is a money move, it is a publicity seeking desperate grab for attention that undermines everything. It is a selfish act by a trusted ally of the artisans and patrons of the fashion arts that robs the culture of the necessary leadership to promote great and innovative design. As the head of Vogue Anna has a responsibility to protect and demand a culture where fashion designers can create and shine without having their designs pillaged and eclipsed by unskilled, untalented, fame-seeking, celebrities who make the designers and tailors invisible, making it impossible for patrons to know the true source of their inspiration and for the designers to get the exposure they need to raise the capital necessary to continue to innovate within the industry. 

With this offensive Kimye cover Anna is pissing on the future of the fashion industry. It should be an art-fueled industry with more artists like Alexander McQueen and L’Wren Scott who knew how to make clothing with their bare hands and truly connected with the artform and the human beings they served, to help celebrate the beauty of the people who admired their work. The energy that passes between a fashion patron and a designer is a real and powerful force of good in this world and the greedy pursuit of fashion fame for fame’s sake has no place in human culture which requires the celebration of skilled artisans and thoughtful, intelligent patrons to survive and thrive.